Release Date: July 09, 2024
ISBN: 9781627783323
eISBN: 9781627785457

LATitude: How You Can Make a Live Apart Together Relationship Work

by Vicki Larson

Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker, who married in 2022, live a block away from each other. David and Victoria Beckham’s house has been designed with “his and hers” wings. Emma Watson strongly believes that nontraditional couples that don’t fit the cookie cutter mold communicate better. Is the secret to stronger long-term relationships spending a healthy amount of time together and apart? Live apart together relationships have increasingly been making headlines in recent years, not only in the United States, but internationally. While it’s hard to get a handle on just how many couples live apart from their romantic partners, it’s estimated that 10 percent of adults around the globe are in LATs. And each time the lifestyle appears in the media, more people are interested in knowing not just why, but how?

Fret not! After years of conducting extensive research and interviews, longtime award-winning journalist and author Vicki Larson has some answers. LATitude: How You Can Make a Live Apart Together Relationship Work is the definitive guide to creating a successful live apart together relationship. From the day-to-day practicalities as well as dealing with stigma and judgment, to sex and legal concerns, Larson tackles various topics, while simultaneously busting the many myths about it. Taking into account different goals and values, she also introduces ideas of new family form into the collective societal consciousness, not as a threat to traditional partnering, but as a valuable addition.

Whether you and your partner(s) are open to the idea of a LAT but don’t know where to start, or are part of a seasoned LAT relationship wondering how to manage unexpected lifestyle changes or that “next phase,” as empty-nesters or caretakers, LATitude has something for everyone. Consider this book your go-to guide to living happily ever after, apart.

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About the author Vicki Larson

Vicki Larson is a longtime award-winning journalist, author of Not Too Old For That: How Women Are Changing the Story of Aging (2022), and co-author of The New I Do: Reshaping Marriage for Skeptics, Realists and Rebels (2014), named a Best Book of 2014 by PopSugar. The lifestyles editor, columnist and writer at a San Francisco Bay Area newspaper, Larson’s writing can also be found in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Guardian, Aeon, AARP’s The...

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Books by Vicki Larson

High praise to Vicki Larson for this thorough—and thoroughly enjoyable—deep dive into one of love’s last taboos. As a LAT myself, I found the research and insight here not only reassuring but empowering. It’s more important than ever that the conventions of romance, life’s previously indelible scripts, are put to the test—and that fresh ways of coupling are given the consideration they so richly deserve. 


—Lauren Apfel, co-founder and executive editor of Motherwell 


Once again Vicki Larson challenges the social constructs of what a ‘successful’ relationship looks like. The answer. . . it’s what works best for you. More and more, couples want to define what works best for them, not just follow a well-worn or traditional path. In this book, Larson delves into how couples cohabitate and shows us how ‘separate is the new sexy.’


—Jennifer Adams, author of A Sleep Divorce: How to Sleep Apart, Not Fall Apart

. . . If the end goal of partnership is to create an environment that fosters a healthy, vibrant relationship, then certainly we need to consider all possibilities available. LATitude is the perfect guide for those who seek to discover, explore, and expand with their mate within a context of commitment and trust.


—Susan Winter, bestselling author and relationship expert

A comprehensive and well-researched book about the joys and benefits of being what I call apartners—committed partners that live apart. Not every couple is meant to live together, or apart for that matter. It’s all about options. There is simply no cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all way to love, and this book will hopefully help readers, and society at large, to think outside the box. Or house!


—Sharon Hyman, director of Apartners: Living Happily Ever Apart



A comprehensive guide on how to live apart—together, delivered through a non-judgemental, historical, practical and exploratory lens. I loved it.


—Dr. Julie Hannan Chartered Psychologist and Psychotherapist, and author of The Midlife Crisis Handbook

Through extensive research as well as candid conversations with couples of all ages and sexual orientations, journalist Vicki Larson explores a seemingly forbidden societal topic: committed romantic couples who choose to live apart from each other. Larson’s LATitude is a must-read, especially for any hesitant men who love the older women leading the way in this growing trend.


—Laura Stassi, Dating While Gray podcast host and author of Romance Redux: Finding Love In Your Later Years


This is essential reading for couples in live-apart relationships, or considering one, as well as friends and relatives trying to understand what goes on when two people share a single love in separate domiciles. Written in a breezy, non-judgmental style, the book is meticulously researched, ranging smoothly, logically, and with great clarity through experts and anecdotes from real, everyday participants. As with traditionally housed marriages, there are pitfalls and rewards. Oddly, it becomes clear that what looks like a fateful decision ends up creating just the same possibilities for happiness or torture that people living together experience. For some it’s a feminist choice, for others a protector of intimacy or boundaries, and for others just another way to balance independence and togetherness. Larson cuts through the data and finds the humanity and love that can dwell here, there, or anywhere.


—Neal Allen, author of Better Days: Tame Your Inner Critic


If you're seeking practical, realistic ways to live ‘together apart’ with another human being, this book is for you. More to the point, Vicki Larson is the author for you. As with her previous books, in LATitude: How You Can Make a Live Apart Together Relationship Work, Larson tackles taboos, busts myths, and challenges the status quo through a fascinating blend of research, interviews, and anecdotes. Regardless of whether or not you ultimately embrace LAT living, you're guaranteed to enjoy every page of this new book, written with Larson's characteristic thoroughness, honesty, and humor. 


—Willow Older, co-author, Today I Noticed: A Little Book of Mindfulness that Will Change the Way You See the World


Larson has her finger on the pulse of an ahead-of-the-curve lifestyle option for couples who want loving committed relationships without sacrificing their own space—and sense of independence. Her deeply-researched book is a must-read for existing "LATs" and a practical how-to guide anyone exploring the potential benefits of a Living Apart Together relationship. Don't miss it.

—Nicole Rodgers, founder and executive director of Family Story


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